Being a mum is never easy. There are so many different things to juggle,
that it can feel like you’re constantly playing catch-up. Whether you’re parenting solo, working long hours, or trying to find time for gym sessions again after giving birth, motherhood comes with its own set of challenges. And if you manage to tick all the boxes and find time for date night, tidy the house every day after work, and make healthy meals every night while still finding time to put on your mascara before the camera comes out… Well then kudos to you! For most of us, being a mum can be a stressful experience. There is no getting around the fact that parenthood will bring its fair share of stressors and difficulties. However, there are ways in which we can minimise this guilt so that it doesn’t get the better of us. Below are some tips on how we can minimise mum guilt as much as possible.
Don’t feel guilty about putting yourself first
While it is essential that you put your child first in everything you do, you also need to make sure that you are not neglecting your own needs. It is crucial that you learn to put yourself first in certain situations so that you don’t end up on the verge of a mental breakdown. Make sure that you have time to do the things that you enjoy. If you have a long commute to work or if you work long hours, try to find ways to sneak in a hobby or something that you enjoy so that you’re not constantly stressed. When you’re with your child, make sure that you are putting your full attention on them. Put yourself in a situation where you don’t have to multi-task so that you have time to truly engage with your child.
Try not to compare yourself to other mums
The majority of parents are constantly comparing themselves to others. Whether you’re comparing the way you look after having a child or you’re comparing the kind of life you lead to that of a friend, it can often lead to feelings of inadequacy. The first thing that you need to remember is that everyone has different experiences and different expectations. You are the only person who knows what works for you, so there is no point in comparing yourself to anyone else. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenthood, so try not to put pressure on yourself to be like everyone else.
Take time for yourself
Make time for yourself, whether that be getting a massage, going to the gym, reading a book, or taking a few hours to read your favourite blogs. Whatever gets your blood flowing again, make sure that you carve out time for it. It is important that you don’t feel guilty about taking time for yourself. Your child will benefit immensely from you having some “you” time. Your child will probably love to spend time with you, and you will be less stressed as a result of having a break.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help
Like we mentioned earlier, motherhood comes with its own set of challenges. While some mums thrive on the pressure, others find themselves struggling with the constant feeling of inadequacy. If you find that you are constantly feeling stressed or guilty, chances are that you could use some help. Whether it is with cleaning the house, cooking healthy meals, or taking care of your child, try to find ways to minimise the stress so that you don’t end up second-guessing yourself and the decisions that you are making for your family. If you’re struggling with the constant feeling of guilt, try to reach out to your loved ones or find a support network where you can talk about your feelings and work through them together.
Reminder
Motherhood comes with its own set of challenges. However, there are ways in which we can minimise the guilt that comes with parenthood. Make sure that you are putting yourself first, try not to compare yourself to other mums, take time for yourself, and don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it. Stay positive and remember that you’re doing an amazing job! Being a parent is one of the hardest jobs out there. There is no getting around the fact that being a parent is a challenging job that requires a lot of patience and hard work. However, there are ways in which we can minimise mum guilt as much as possible and allow us to enjoy the journey with our children as much as possible.
Love this blog so much truth and support in here and even as a nana that has my granddaughter for days at a time every week we love having her with us but all of the above still come into play so thank you for the support 🥰🥰🥰
Yes!! Mum guilt is so prevalent in so many mums but we should never feel guilty for putting ourselves first. The ‘happy mama = happy baby’ cliché is so very true.
Great tips here.